The precipice of my sanity

I have been pushed,
I have been manipulated,
I have been abused
Mentally and emotionally.

I have been taken advantage of,
I have been broken down
But with each fall I took
I picked myself up.

I tried to remember the strength
I have held, kept deep inside
And that is the reason
I was able to lift back up

But this darkness seems to be a constant.
I seem to find the air so tight I cannot breath,
Struggling to gain my balance,
I finally realize why.

The darkness has kept me blind
To the goal of the enemy
I have fought back,
And now I stand at precipice of my sanity.

I have given this darkness an eminence
Not worthy of power.
I have allowed myself to be defeated
By its greed as it craves more power,

Power over my life
And everything it contains.
I have been forced to abandon logic,
Yet I keep my naïve view that even in the darkest heart

Light will shine at one time or another.
I know what must be done,
I have known for a while
But fear held me back from moving forward.

My naivety will keep me crippled
Because it is unable provide direction,
Logic is what I need because it will allow me to do what I need to
In order to once more survive the challenges of the darkness I am consumed by.

But at what point
Will the demons that torture me  face their punishment?
How much longer will they be allowed to keep their attack going?
Just when I think that I have reached a point of hopelessness

I see the faint sparkle of distant stars,
Shining brighter the longer I gaze apon them.
These are beacons of hope
And they beckon me.

To remind me that
No matter what they will always be there
Because they are gifts that I have been given
To use as tools,

And they come in many forms,
Like the souls in life that touch my spirit
Giving me strength and support,
To the foundations of a talent unique to me,

That is to be used to reach out to others
Who can relate to my struggles,
Knowing they are not alone
And also that their victory is a possibility…

Thank you for your continued support,

Matthew Myles


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